It’s Valentine’s Day by the end of this week. That means a lot of mushy love songs, red balloons and flowers everywhere, and retailers taking advantage of this season of proclaiming their love to their one and only. I like Valentine’s Day, to be perfectly honest. Hubby and I always go on a date but we usually do it either before or after Valentine’s Day. We almost never go out on the night itself knowing that people will also be out. When we do go out, I enjoy seeing couples walking around, holding hands, the lady usually holding a bouquet of flowers. *kilig*
Over on Manila Work-At-Home moms, a very lively discussion on how to spice up our love lives with our husbands is going on. I love the sharing, the transparency and honesty of the group. Surprisingly, some of the mommies said I made the discussion a lot spicier, haha! Some even suggested that I should blog about it. However I declined doing so because I don’t want to expose myself since this blog is open to the internet world and families and friends read it, too. I decided to just share about how I show my love to my husband. Online casino Ireland. ###
Years ago, I attended a short course in a theological school in Quezon City – Partners in Ministry – a course designed for wives of pastors and missionaries. My husband’s not a pastor but I still decided to attend. One of the subjects was taught by a pastor’s wife – Mrs. Leah Marasigan Darwin. I can’t remember in full detail what she taught but I’ll talk about what really stuck to me. During the intro, she said this subject she teaches has changed many wives. She knows this because their husbands have approached her and thanked her for whatever it is she was teaching. They share that their wives have changed in many ways, including in their bedrooms.
Photo by Mark Anthony Maranga
First thing she said was to get rid of the lola dusters. These are the Filipino version of a house dress which is basically shapeless. It may be comfortable for us moms as we do our housework but it does nothing for our figures. Since men are visual in nature, it does matter to them what we are wearing. Let’s try to make ourselves as attractive as we can when we meet our husbands. I have to admit that I fail in this area most of the time, not only do I have dusters, I have t-shirts and shorts that hubby does not like. I think he’s forgiven me for this because I can hardly wear sexy clothes with the kids around all of the time. BUT he has expressed his desire to see me in better looking house dresses, not shorts and t-shirt, when I stay at home. He also likes it that I dress up when we go out, so I make it a point to do so. Though I have to clarify that I dress up well not only for my husband, but also for my own enjoyment.
Praise your husband in public and in private. If you know a pastor or missionary, you would know that he is adored by the people he ministers to. If the wife is not his biggest fan, he can fall into temptation when another woman praises him or shows special attention constantly. I take this one very seriously. Although Gary D. is not a pastor, his work exposes him to a lot of people daily. He is an achiever and I’m aware that he is also admired at work for his dedication to his job and his fairness as a manager. He is approachable and attractive. I always make it a point to admire him in private and in public. I point out the him his strengths, how handsome (and hot) he is and what a great husband and father he is. When he is speaking or singing in public, I am always there and I’m his biggest fan.
Photo by MRLightworkz Photography
In church, young teenagers and single adults are constantly reminded to abstain from sex before marriage, not only sex but actions that may lead to sex. BUT that all goes away once you are married. Leah reminded us that God designed sex to be enjoyed by husband and wife. In fact, there are verses in Songs of Solomon that talks about it. This means that once you become a wife, all you’ve learned in keeping yourself pure goes out the door. It is meant to be enjoyed by husband and wife with no reservations. I love how Topaz Mommy explains this point well in her blog post a few days ago.
Finally, love your husbands as the Lord loves His children. How much does the Lord love His children? God the Father loves us so much that He sacrificed His only Son, Jesus Christ, to die on the cross so we can have eternal life. Here is what 1 John 3:16 says:
We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us.
it’s not to say that we have to give up our lives for our husbands, but this verse talks about the length and breadth and depth of God’s love for us. His love is immeasurable, unconditional and pure. God is our yardstick for love, especially in loving our husbands. Of course, it is unrealistic to expect that we humans can ever love as God does, He is God and He is different. But we can model God’s unconditional love to our husbands.
I can’t remember everything she taught us but these are the major points I’ve taken to heart as I take care of my husband. The Lord is good and He blessed me with a good husband. It has not and never has been a bed of roses being married to him. He’s got his faults and weaknesses (as I do) but I would rather spend the years loving him along with his weaknesses than not to have him in my life at all.
How about you, dear sister in the Lord? How do you show your love to your husband?
NEXT POST: Tangible Ways to Let Him Know You Love Him